This post was supposed to be about the lovely visit that I had with my Grandma this weekend.
This post was supposed to be about the progress we have made on our master bath renovation.
This post was supposed to be about me accepting the blog award from Melissa (Thank you and I promise I will accept the award officially and follow the rules soon).
Hell, it was supposed to be about the shower basin that was supposed to be delivered tonight at 5 and here it is almost 3 hours later and the delivery man hasn't even made it to our house yet...
But it isn't.
This post is about another co-worker who told me this morning that she is expecting a baby. And not just any co-worker. One of the girls that I supervise. I will get to watch her grow every single day of the week and wish it was me.
Oh, and did I mention that she just got married on December 26th???
She had some testing done right before the wedding because there was no prevention going on during the 2 year courtship and no accidents had occurred. She was told by her OBGYN that she had a tilted uterus and would need IUI to get PG. This morning, she told me that she had visited a natural healing person (the spanish equivalent of a witch doctor?) and that it had worked. She offered to take me to the place since it worked for her. It was a really sweet thought, I know. And, in the end, I may go to said witch doctor. (Because if I can give myself shots every day and be put to sleep for egg retrieval, why would I be against drinking a little stinky tea and doing some things designed to cleanse my body, right???)
But right now, I am struggling with the here and now. The last time this happened to me was right after I lost the only baby I have ever officially been pregnant with and I really struggled with it. Watching her baby grow reminded me every day that MY baby would have been a few weeks older.
I don't know if this one will be quite as hard (and I sure hope not) because I know this girl will be a wonderful mommy. And I really am happy for her. Ok, maybe 99%. No, probably more like 86%. Well, I can't lie to you all, it is probably more like 75% happy.
Seriously, though, I gave her a big hug and I will do my best to not begrudge her because she has what I can't have.
And I promise I will post more about happy things later. Like how beautiful our tile will be.
6 comments:
Oh Carli, I'm so sorry. Don't feel bad about not being 100% happy. I can name several occasions where I was -100% happy for people. But it was mostly because I was sad for myself... And that's okay too.
Hope to hear the happy stuff later, but for right now please feel free to post about whatever you feel like. We'll be here no matter what.
Hugs.
I'm so sorry, Carli. These things never get easy. It's always like a bucket of cold water down your back.
I second Melissa. Don't feel bad because you're not 100% thrilled. You were very caring in congratulating her. How you feel inside is your own business and it's only natural to feel sad.
I wish I could be going to meet you next month and give you the biggest hug I have. In the meantime, can you settle for virtual ((((hugs))))?
I'm so sorry Carli. For some reason I kept thinking about you today. ((HUGS)) until the real one can come!
Carli, I know how much that stinks. I am so sorry. I give you credit for being anything over 50% happy. It's hard. ((HUGS))
You post about whatever you need to, whenever you want to. Even if every post for a year is less than happy, I'd still read. (I'd be really sad for you, but still here to support and read). I'd rather have honest posts from you than happy fluff about tile any day.
(BUT I can't wait to see pics of the reno all the same. :))
I'm so sorry, Carli. Dealing with these things are never easy, and I don't blame you for have less than 100% happiness about it. It's tough. Sending you lots of hugs!
I'm so sorry Carli. It's the worst when you work with someone and have to watch them grow since you have no option or way out of it. It's nice she was trying to help but at the same time it gets really old when people don't just get that it's going to take more than a "witch doctor" to make things right. I agree with Katie, anything over 50% is so much more admirable than anything I ever was. BIG HUGS and can't wait to see pictures of the tile!
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