2011 was a very interesting year for us. We quit our jobs, packed our bags, and moved to a new state. We lived in condo in an old Mental Hospital. We found out we were having a little boy. We bought and moved into a new house. We welcomed our little boy into this world 6 weeks early and life has never been and will never be the same. These last 6 1/2 months have flown by and our little boy is growing up so fast. He has been working so hard on attempting to sit independently and will be doing that before you know it!
Even though 2011 was the year that our dream to become parents came true, we jokingly dubbed this year the year of "Next Year" because there were so many activities we wanted to participate in here in our new city but couldn't due to my being pregnant or the fact that we had an infant. Today we decided that New Years Eve would continue in that tradition. As I mentioned in my post about Christmas, Carder is recovering from an ear infection. And I have a nasty cough. I actually went to Urgent Care today because my chest started feeling tight and I was diagnosed with a case of bronchitis. So, we will be ringing in the year in our home sitting on our couch instead of walking downtown to watch the Cherry Drop as we had originally planned. Derek is having a glass or two of wine and I have taken my medicine that contains Codeine and I plan on sleeping the new year right on in (much like I did last year when I was so tired from 1st trimester pregnancy that I couldn't keep my eyes open!)
This holiday season has been so busy and I haven't taken the time to put it out here just how thankful I am that THIS was the year that I didn't have to spend the holidays wishing for a baby. I am so thankful that 2011 was the year that we were blessed with Carder. My heart is blissfully full and I am truly happy. And grateful.
And I can't wait to see what 2012 has in store for us! I have a feeling it is going to be a wonderfully fun year!
For those still waiting, I hope that 2012 is YOUR year. You were all in my thoughts this holiday season.
Saturday, December 31, 2011
Kisses from Carder
One day this week, (Tuesday I think) Carder put his arms on both sides of my head and pulled his face close to mine, mouth wide open. He planted his open mouth squarely on my chin and rubbed it around. I wasn't quite sure of this at the time, but I think I had just gotten my first kiss.
In the next couple of days, he repeated this action with increasing frequency. However, his aim went from my chin to my cheek. And right now, I am getting lots of wet kisses each day. These kisses are always coupled with one of his cute little hugs, too.
All of those tears I cried waiting for him was SOOOOO worth it.
In the next couple of days, he repeated this action with increasing frequency. However, his aim went from my chin to my cheek. And right now, I am getting lots of wet kisses each day. These kisses are always coupled with one of his cute little hugs, too.
All of those tears I cried waiting for him was SOOOOO worth it.
Friday, December 30, 2011
Christmas 2011
For years, I have dreamed about our first Christmas with a baby. There were so many things that I was looking forward to - the first Christmas card we would send with our little bundle of joy plastered on the front, the look of excitement in the baby's eyes as he/she looked at the sparkling lights on the Christmas tree, hanging the "Baby's First Christmas" Ornaments, the excitement of Christmas morning...I was so excited that after years of hoping, we would finally be getting to experience our first Christmas as a family.
As Christmas neared, things were looking great. We had a photo shoot for our Christmas card where I got lots of wonderful pictures (I think I took about 150!). You may notice that in the background of the pictures on the tree, there is a snowflake ornament. Yes, I planned it this way. Since I couldn't pick a favorite to use on the card, we used a collage of several of them. The card turned out wonderfully and I got them mailed out on time. Here are a few for your enjoyment:
Around the time that I printed the Christmas cards, I realized that there was actually 1 week less before Christmas than I thought there was. YIKES!!! So, I had to ramp things up a notch to get everything ready.
Our plan for Christmases in the future is to spend Christmas morning in our own home so that Carder can open his presents and will know that Santa will know just where to find him. However, since he wouldn't remember this Christmas, I told Derek that we could go to his parents home to spend the holiday with them, his sister, and his grandfather. So, we were going to open our presents at home on Christmas Eve morning and then would head down south a couple of hours to his parents home.
But, in keeping with the spirit of this year, nothing went according to plan.
About 2 weeks before Christmas, Carder caught another cold. This, in itself, wasn't a problem. He was a bit miserable but wasn't running a fever and seemed to be in fairly good spirits. Derek caught the cold and had sinus issues and a sore throat for a few days. I caught the cold and had a sore throat and a terrible cough. But we were prepared to power through it.
On December 23, Carder took a turn for the worse and spiked a fever. He gagged during a coughing fit and threw up. I wasn't too concerned with the fever until it reached over 102 and then he threw up again - this time without the coughing. Since the Pediatrician's office was already closed for the Holiday, I was told to take him to Urgent Care. At Urgent Care, they checked his O2 levels and were concerned that it wasn't over 94%. So, an X-ray ruled out pneumonia and a breathing treatment was given in an effort to increase his O2 level. When it didn't work, they decided to send us to the ER. I was pretty concerned at this point.
At the ER, his O2 stats were fine (which let me breathe a sigh of relief), but they were concerned that his fever wasn't responding. An hour after giving the meds, it had risen to almost 103. So, they gave him an IV and administered fluids and drew blood and got a nasal swab to rule out any really nasty viruses. Everything checked out fine, so they gave us instructions for Tylenol and Motrin dosing for fever reduction (which is apparently higher than that for pain relief). Almost 7 hours after the ordeal began, we returned home. And Carder slept between us for the next several nights - this gave Derek and I both some peace of mind.
So, it was quickly decided that we wouldn't be heading to Derek's parents. They decided to come to our house. We have a 3 bedroom home (meaning we only have 1 extra bed) and we had enough company coming that we needed 3 sleeping spaces. They arrived on Christmas Eve with all of the fixings for Christmas dinner and lots of presents and love for little Carder. Carder helped us open some of his gifts and was generally the cutest little boy in the world - just with really tired eyes and the tendency to cry and cling to Mommy.
Here are a few pictures of Christmas.
They stayed less than 24 hours and it was nice to have his family there for Christmas, but I swear the place was like National Lampoons Christmas Vacation - down to the huge dog (Sarah has a Great Dane/Black Lab mix) that our little Murfy was bound and determined to out-bark. So, as nice as it was to see them arrive, it was nice to have the house quiet again as well. And Carder - even though he felt terrible and kept a fever pretty much the whole time - was a trouper through it all. Although he ate like absolute shit (I was really concerned that we would have to take him back to the hospital for another IV of fluids.)
By the Monday after Christmas, Carder was still running a fever of over 102, so we took him back to his Ped's office. By now, he has acquired 2 nasty ears - one that is irritated and the other that is "really angry". I am not sure if you would consider this a double ear infection, but he is now on an antibiotic and has to follow up with the Ped again on the 16th.
Carder's fever seems to be gone now and he seems to finally be on the mend. I am so glad that my little man is starting to feel better.
As if this wasn't enough Holiday drama, Christmas evening I gained some new symptoms. I began running a fever and began to have stomach issues. Within 24 hours, the worst had passed but I still felt pretty rough through Tuesday evening. And by Tuesday - Derek had the stomach bug.
As if this saga wasn't long enough, my cold symptoms that had eased up have now returned with a vengeance. I have a terrible dry, barky cough and I am so tired of being sick...
I am hoping for a healthy New Year...
As Christmas neared, things were looking great. We had a photo shoot for our Christmas card where I got lots of wonderful pictures (I think I took about 150!). You may notice that in the background of the pictures on the tree, there is a snowflake ornament. Yes, I planned it this way. Since I couldn't pick a favorite to use on the card, we used a collage of several of them. The card turned out wonderfully and I got them mailed out on time. Here are a few for your enjoyment:
Around the time that I printed the Christmas cards, I realized that there was actually 1 week less before Christmas than I thought there was. YIKES!!! So, I had to ramp things up a notch to get everything ready.
Our plan for Christmases in the future is to spend Christmas morning in our own home so that Carder can open his presents and will know that Santa will know just where to find him. However, since he wouldn't remember this Christmas, I told Derek that we could go to his parents home to spend the holiday with them, his sister, and his grandfather. So, we were going to open our presents at home on Christmas Eve morning and then would head down south a couple of hours to his parents home.
But, in keeping with the spirit of this year, nothing went according to plan.
About 2 weeks before Christmas, Carder caught another cold. This, in itself, wasn't a problem. He was a bit miserable but wasn't running a fever and seemed to be in fairly good spirits. Derek caught the cold and had sinus issues and a sore throat for a few days. I caught the cold and had a sore throat and a terrible cough. But we were prepared to power through it.
On December 23, Carder took a turn for the worse and spiked a fever. He gagged during a coughing fit and threw up. I wasn't too concerned with the fever until it reached over 102 and then he threw up again - this time without the coughing. Since the Pediatrician's office was already closed for the Holiday, I was told to take him to Urgent Care. At Urgent Care, they checked his O2 levels and were concerned that it wasn't over 94%. So, an X-ray ruled out pneumonia and a breathing treatment was given in an effort to increase his O2 level. When it didn't work, they decided to send us to the ER. I was pretty concerned at this point.
At the ER, his O2 stats were fine (which let me breathe a sigh of relief), but they were concerned that his fever wasn't responding. An hour after giving the meds, it had risen to almost 103. So, they gave him an IV and administered fluids and drew blood and got a nasal swab to rule out any really nasty viruses. Everything checked out fine, so they gave us instructions for Tylenol and Motrin dosing for fever reduction (which is apparently higher than that for pain relief). Almost 7 hours after the ordeal began, we returned home. And Carder slept between us for the next several nights - this gave Derek and I both some peace of mind.
So, it was quickly decided that we wouldn't be heading to Derek's parents. They decided to come to our house. We have a 3 bedroom home (meaning we only have 1 extra bed) and we had enough company coming that we needed 3 sleeping spaces. They arrived on Christmas Eve with all of the fixings for Christmas dinner and lots of presents and love for little Carder. Carder helped us open some of his gifts and was generally the cutest little boy in the world - just with really tired eyes and the tendency to cry and cling to Mommy.
Here are a few pictures of Christmas.
They stayed less than 24 hours and it was nice to have his family there for Christmas, but I swear the place was like National Lampoons Christmas Vacation - down to the huge dog (Sarah has a Great Dane/Black Lab mix) that our little Murfy was bound and determined to out-bark. So, as nice as it was to see them arrive, it was nice to have the house quiet again as well. And Carder - even though he felt terrible and kept a fever pretty much the whole time - was a trouper through it all. Although he ate like absolute shit (I was really concerned that we would have to take him back to the hospital for another IV of fluids.)
By the Monday after Christmas, Carder was still running a fever of over 102, so we took him back to his Ped's office. By now, he has acquired 2 nasty ears - one that is irritated and the other that is "really angry". I am not sure if you would consider this a double ear infection, but he is now on an antibiotic and has to follow up with the Ped again on the 16th.
Carder's fever seems to be gone now and he seems to finally be on the mend. I am so glad that my little man is starting to feel better.
As if this wasn't enough Holiday drama, Christmas evening I gained some new symptoms. I began running a fever and began to have stomach issues. Within 24 hours, the worst had passed but I still felt pretty rough through Tuesday evening. And by Tuesday - Derek had the stomach bug.
As if this saga wasn't long enough, my cold symptoms that had eased up have now returned with a vengeance. I have a terrible dry, barky cough and I am so tired of being sick...
I am hoping for a healthy New Year...
Monday, December 19, 2011
Many the Milestones
Life has been really busy lately. In the last few weeks, Carder has experienced several milestones:
First Snowfall (11/17/2011)
First Glimpse of Our Decorated Christmas Tree (11/18/2011) and he loved the lights...
First Long Roadtrip (11/21/2011-11/27/2011) during which he made his first trip into another state. He traveled through Indiana, Ohio, Kentucky, Tennessee, North Carolina, and Georgia. On the way to Georgia, we left at 6:45 pm after we both worked all day and drove straight through the night. Carder slept in his carseat from about 7:30 pm until around 5:45 the next morning. He was a great traveller - all things considered - and my mom thinks we should change his middle name to "Roadtrip".
During this roadtrip, it was his first time meeting several new relatives and loved ones. These included Great Grandma (Gin Gin), Great Grandpa (Pop), Great Grandma (Janice), Aunt Karina (my best friend), Aunt Cameron (my college roommate) and her 6 week old daughter Ella Kate, and several other friends of mine and Derek's. He also met his great aunts and uncles. The only person missing was his Uncle Andrew (who is currently on a tour of duty with the military).
He had his first Thanksgiving (11/24/2011)
And, he had his first overnight stay in a hotel. (11/26/11) I didn't think to take a picture of this as a milestone at the time. Oh well.
During the roadtrip, he became very interested in cups. So, on 11/28/2011, he made his first attempt to drink from a sippy cup. He has now mastered drinking from it, but hasn't figured out how to hold it at the right angle to get anything from it yet. However, he will gladly drink from it if Derek or I hold it for him.
First Snowfall (11/17/2011)
First Glimpse of Our Decorated Christmas Tree (11/18/2011) and he loved the lights...
First Long Roadtrip (11/21/2011-11/27/2011) during which he made his first trip into another state. He traveled through Indiana, Ohio, Kentucky, Tennessee, North Carolina, and Georgia. On the way to Georgia, we left at 6:45 pm after we both worked all day and drove straight through the night. Carder slept in his carseat from about 7:30 pm until around 5:45 the next morning. He was a great traveller - all things considered - and my mom thinks we should change his middle name to "Roadtrip".
During this roadtrip, it was his first time meeting several new relatives and loved ones. These included Great Grandma (Gin Gin), Great Grandpa (Pop), Great Grandma (Janice), Aunt Karina (my best friend), Aunt Cameron (my college roommate) and her 6 week old daughter Ella Kate, and several other friends of mine and Derek's. He also met his great aunts and uncles. The only person missing was his Uncle Andrew (who is currently on a tour of duty with the military).
He had his first Thanksgiving (11/24/2011)
And, he had his first overnight stay in a hotel. (11/26/11) I didn't think to take a picture of this as a milestone at the time. Oh well.
During the roadtrip, he became very interested in cups. So, on 11/28/2011, he made his first attempt to drink from a sippy cup. He has now mastered drinking from it, but hasn't figured out how to hold it at the right angle to get anything from it yet. However, he will gladly drink from it if Derek or I hold it for him.
On 12/18/11, Carder tried meat for the first time. We gave him turkey in preparation for Christmas. He seemed to enjoy it despite how disgusting it smelled. And, TMI I know, his poops after the meat smelled just as nasty as the meat in the jar did.
Also, in the last few days, he has started to do this thing where he puts his arms out and grabs hair on each side of my head and pulls me closer to him - almost like a hug. It is super sweet and it absolutely melts my heart.
Six Months Old
At Six Months:
- Weighs 17 pounds 2 ounces
- Is 27 1/2 Inches
- Is wearing 6-9 Month Sized Clothing - but has almost grown out of anything with feet already!
- Is eating between 6-8 oz per feeding, 4 times per day.
- Is eating 3 Solid meals per day. Has tried Rice Cereal, Oatmeal Cereal, Bananas, Avocado, Green Beans, Butternut Squash, Pears, Apples, Sweet Potatoes, Green Peas, Carrots, & Parsnips. The only thing he doesn't care for very much is Carrots. This boy LOVES his solids.
- Is consistently sleeping through the night (falls asleep around 7:30 or 8 and will sleep until 6 or 7 in the morning. Will often awaken during the night but will fall back asleep fairly easily). However, the last couple of weeks he has been awakening around 4:00 in the morning.
- Sleeping unswaddled.
- Consistently smiles and coos and laughs.
- Still loves to "blow spit"
- Has discovered his feet and is enthralled with them.
- Helps out during diaper changes by putting his hands on his thighs and "holds" his legs.
- Will clasp his hands together below his chin (cutest thing ever...)
- Loves to lounge in Mommy and Daddy's bed (always with close supervision)
- Still isn't the biggest fan of tummy time.
- Loves his bouncy seat and jumperoo.
- Consistently rolls from tummy to back. Is showing signs of rolling from back to tummy.
- Loves to sit with assistance anywhere he can. He is very close to sitting unsupported and will be doing that before long. Likes his Bumbo chair for limited periods of time.
- Loves to stand with assistance. Will stand while holding on to something without assistance for a limited time.
- Loves to stare at the ceiling fan, windows, lights.
- Loves his Tigger, Ball with Beads, Haba rings, and his crinkle bear.
- Tolerates rides in car seat quite well
- Is wearing size 3 Disposable diapers
Wednesday, November 16, 2011
Laughter
Carder has been giving us short little giggles from time to time. So far, they have been very short little laughs though.
On Sunday night (11/13/11), I was holding Carder and tickling him and he busted out a full blown laugh. Melted my heart.
Although Derek was sitting on the couch, he was absorbed into the football game and he didn't hear it. Luckily, Carder provided a repeat performance of ticklish laughter for Daddy just a couple of moments later.
Since then, he has also responded with laughter to a funny noise and a raspberry on his belly.
I know I keep saying it is sad to watch him grow so quickly. But I must admit that I do enjoy watching him develop into such a cute little person.
On Sunday night (11/13/11), I was holding Carder and tickling him and he busted out a full blown laugh. Melted my heart.
Although Derek was sitting on the couch, he was absorbed into the football game and he didn't hear it. Luckily, Carder provided a repeat performance of ticklish laughter for Daddy just a couple of moments later.
Since then, he has also responded with laughter to a funny noise and a raspberry on his belly.
I know I keep saying it is sad to watch him grow so quickly. But I must admit that I do enjoy watching him develop into such a cute little person.
5 Months Old
At Five Months:
- Weighs ???
- Is around 26 1/2 inches long
- Is wearing 3-6 Month Sized Clothing. However, in anything with attached feet, he has moved up to the 6-9 Month Size.
- Is eating between 6-8 oz per feeding, 5 times per day. Sometimes will eat as 10 1/2 oz at one sitting. Eats Similac Advanced.
- Feedings are approximately 3 hours apart during the day
- Is eating 2-3 meals of Solids per day. Has tried Rice Cereal, Bananas, Avocados, Green Beans, Butternut Squash, and Pears.
- Is consistently sleeping through the night (falls asleep around 7:30-8 and will sleep until 6 or 7 in the morning. Will often awaken during the night but will fall back asleep fairly easily
- Sleeps Unswaddled.
- Consistently smiles and coos.
- Is beginning to giggle a little bit.
- Still loves to "blow spit". This is now combined with what sounds like "a-boo" and the "boo" part is typically spit blowing.
- Has discovered his feet and is enthralled with them.
- Helps out during diaper changes by putting his hands on his thighs and "holds" his legs.
- Loves to clasp his hands together below his chin (cutest thing ever...)
- Loves to lay in Mommy and Daddy's bed (always with close supervision)
- Still isn't the biggest fan of tummy time.
- Consistently rolls from tummy to back. Is showing signs of rolling from back to tummy.
- Loves to sit with assistance anywhere he can. Likes his Bumbo chair for limited periods of time.
- Loves his bouncy seat and his jumperoo.
- Hasn't been using his swing much in the last few weeks.
- Loves to stare at the ceiling fan, windows, lights.
- Loves his Tigger and his ball with beads. Likes Haba rings.
- Tolerates rides in car seat quite well.
- Had first overnight trip this month
- Is wearing size 2 Disposable Diapers.
Monday, November 7, 2011
200 and An Homage
This is my 200th post!!!
For this post, I want to take the time to pay homage to the current title of my blog. For the last few months, I have been thinking about renaming my blog. When I first started this blog, it was about our struggles to grow our family. It was a place where I could come to write out my thoughts about just how damn hard this journey was for us. It was a place where I could list out the details of our upcoming treatments and a place I could go to let it all out when those treatments didn't work.
When I named my blog, I didn't want to give it a name that represented all of the heartache I felt on a daily basis. Instead, I looked to where I often find inspiration - to a place that never judges you for how you feel and where you can always find something to fit your mood. I looked to music.
I first heard this song while watching an episode of One Tree Hill. The artist, Kate Voegele, is often featured on One Tree Hill as the recurring character of Mia (who is also a singer/songwriter on the show). Anyway, after the first time I heard this song, I knew that I had to have it on my iPod.
The lyrics of this song spoke to me right where I was in my journey. There were the days that I felt beaten down and was afraid I couldn't take one more step down the path of infertility. When I had tears streaming down my face, I would put this song on repeat and listen to it as many times as it took for the tears to stop and for the feeling of hopelessness to go away. There were also the days when we were mid treatment and I was afraid that the treatment wouldn't work. With shaking hands, I would push the play button and sing along until I felt like things were going to be okay. And on the days that I felt that my dream of becoming a mother was slipping away from me, I would blast this song and sing at the top of my lungs until I felt a glimmer of that hope return.
Another thing this title did for me - probably inadvertently - was to sensor what I typed here. When I logged on to blogger to type a post, the first thing I saw was this title staring back at me. And no matter what page I navigated to, it was still right there at the top to remind me of my inspiration. Without even realizing it, a post that was going to be really down in the dumps took on a less dramatic format. I found that even as I typed, the name of the blog helped to lift my mood.
I think I have picked out the new name for my blog. And in the coming days or weeks (or, who am I kidding - it might be months...), you will see the name change happen. But before I changed the title, I wanted to give you all an opportunity to know exactly what this song and title has done for me.
So, without further ado, a link to the music and the words to the song that has meant so much to me in these last few years. I hope that you enjoy. And, perhaps it will also give you the inspiration that it has given to me.
For this post, I want to take the time to pay homage to the current title of my blog. For the last few months, I have been thinking about renaming my blog. When I first started this blog, it was about our struggles to grow our family. It was a place where I could come to write out my thoughts about just how damn hard this journey was for us. It was a place where I could list out the details of our upcoming treatments and a place I could go to let it all out when those treatments didn't work.
When I named my blog, I didn't want to give it a name that represented all of the heartache I felt on a daily basis. Instead, I looked to where I often find inspiration - to a place that never judges you for how you feel and where you can always find something to fit your mood. I looked to music.
I first heard this song while watching an episode of One Tree Hill. The artist, Kate Voegele, is often featured on One Tree Hill as the recurring character of Mia (who is also a singer/songwriter on the show). Anyway, after the first time I heard this song, I knew that I had to have it on my iPod.
The lyrics of this song spoke to me right where I was in my journey. There were the days that I felt beaten down and was afraid I couldn't take one more step down the path of infertility. When I had tears streaming down my face, I would put this song on repeat and listen to it as many times as it took for the tears to stop and for the feeling of hopelessness to go away. There were also the days when we were mid treatment and I was afraid that the treatment wouldn't work. With shaking hands, I would push the play button and sing along until I felt like things were going to be okay. And on the days that I felt that my dream of becoming a mother was slipping away from me, I would blast this song and sing at the top of my lungs until I felt a glimmer of that hope return.
Another thing this title did for me - probably inadvertently - was to sensor what I typed here. When I logged on to blogger to type a post, the first thing I saw was this title staring back at me. And no matter what page I navigated to, it was still right there at the top to remind me of my inspiration. Without even realizing it, a post that was going to be really down in the dumps took on a less dramatic format. I found that even as I typed, the name of the blog helped to lift my mood.
I think I have picked out the new name for my blog. And in the coming days or weeks (or, who am I kidding - it might be months...), you will see the name change happen. But before I changed the title, I wanted to give you all an opportunity to know exactly what this song and title has done for me.
So, without further ado, a link to the music and the words to the song that has meant so much to me in these last few years. I hope that you enjoy. And, perhaps it will also give you the inspiration that it has given to me.
It's Only Life
Kate Voegele
Tears are forming in your eyes
A storm is warning in the sky
The end of the world, it seems
You bend down and you fall on your knees
Well get back on your feet, yeah
Don't look away
Don't run away
Hey baby it's only life
Don't lose your faith, Don't run away
Hey baby its only life
Yea it's only life
You were always playing hard
Never could let down your guard
Never could let down your guard
But you can't win
If you never give in
To that voice within
Saying pick up your chin
Baby let go of it
[Chorus]
Take your hesitance
And your self-defense
Leave them behind, it's only life
Don't be so afraid
Of facing everyday
Just take your time, it's only life
I'll be your stepping-stone
No, don't be so alone
Just hold on tight, it's only life
[Chorus]
Sunday, November 6, 2011
The Start of Solids
At Carder's 4 month Well Child Visit, the Pediatrician suggested that we should start solid foods - starting with Rice cereal and moving to veggies and fruits if he tolerated it well. He also recommended that we follow the 3 day rule between introduction of new foods.
We gave him his first taste of solids by introducing Rice Cereal on October 15th. I must admit, Carder wasn't a big fan. I think the first few times we fed him, he may have swallowed a couple of bites and that was it. The rest was spit out. Or sneezed out. A small taste of it and I couldn't blame him.
After some Internet research, I determined that it wasn't necessary to start with Rice Cereal. So, we moved on to something with some flavor - Carrots. These went over a little better than the rice cereal. He still wasn't eating a ton of it, but he definitely seemed more interested.
We spent quite a bit of time keeping his hands out of his mouth. And the carrots got all over his sleeves. (Note to self: Strip baby before feeding something brightly colored...)
I had decided to attempt to make our own baby food - but hadn't gotten started yet - so I had purchased the carrots. But, since some friends of mine had made their own in the past and said it wasn't too hard, I was going to give it a shot.
Through another Internet search about the order of which to introduce solids, I came across the Wholesome Baby Food website.
Carrots weren't one of the veggies they suggested to start with if you were giving solids to a 4 month old. And, since he still wasn't swallowing a ton of it, I decided that perhaps I should give him a taste of something a little sweeter to get him kick started.
That night, I mashed up a banana and mixed it with some formula to thin it a little bit. He seemed to enjoy them and he ate/wore about half of the serving. For this feeding, I decided to stop fighting his arms and let him hold on to my hand as I fed him. I also let him spend some time gumming the spoon. I think that both of these actions really helped. By the next day, you would have thought he was an old pro as he ate every bit of his bananas. It didn't take long before he was readily opening for the spoon - and sometimes even lunging towards it. He "talks" about his food (I normally say "Mmmmm, yummy!" after he takes a bite. He responds with something that resembles "a-boo")
After about a week of bananas, we introduced avocados. He loves those as well and ate those for almost a week.
While we were serving bananas and avocados (which can just be mashed up with a fork), I spent some time making other foods to store in the freezer. I have butternut squash, pears, green beans, carrots, and peas all ready to go. I will be making some apples and sweet potatoes next. Making your own baby food really isn't that hard. To me, the hardest part is pushing them through a wire strainer - and we don't do this with every food - just the ones that have parts that don't puree well (peas and green beans as the skins are rather difficult to completely puree).
Yesterday, we started serving green beans and he seems to like those as well.
His first few attempts at feeding in the high chair didn't go too well. He didn't seem to like it very much. So, we would put him in there for a short time and would then move him to his bouncy seat. He no longer seems bothered by the high chair - he will use his hands to bang on the tray and he will grab for toys that I place on the tray for him to play with if he isn't eating. He will sit there and wait for me to bring his food and then will sit there contentedly for quite a while after he has finished his meal as well - especially if I give him some toys to play with.
And I have to say that even though it is partly sad that my baby is growing up so quickly and is now eating solid foods, I really do enjoy watching him enjoy the tastes of solid food.
We gave him his first taste of solids by introducing Rice Cereal on October 15th. I must admit, Carder wasn't a big fan. I think the first few times we fed him, he may have swallowed a couple of bites and that was it. The rest was spit out. Or sneezed out. A small taste of it and I couldn't blame him.
After some Internet research, I determined that it wasn't necessary to start with Rice Cereal. So, we moved on to something with some flavor - Carrots. These went over a little better than the rice cereal. He still wasn't eating a ton of it, but he definitely seemed more interested.
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| Daddy feeding Carrots |
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| Carrot Face - Don't you love how my mess coordinates with my bib? |
We spent quite a bit of time keeping his hands out of his mouth. And the carrots got all over his sleeves. (Note to self: Strip baby before feeding something brightly colored...)
I had decided to attempt to make our own baby food - but hadn't gotten started yet - so I had purchased the carrots. But, since some friends of mine had made their own in the past and said it wasn't too hard, I was going to give it a shot.
Through another Internet search about the order of which to introduce solids, I came across the Wholesome Baby Food website.
Carrots weren't one of the veggies they suggested to start with if you were giving solids to a 4 month old. And, since he still wasn't swallowing a ton of it, I decided that perhaps I should give him a taste of something a little sweeter to get him kick started.
That night, I mashed up a banana and mixed it with some formula to thin it a little bit. He seemed to enjoy them and he ate/wore about half of the serving. For this feeding, I decided to stop fighting his arms and let him hold on to my hand as I fed him. I also let him spend some time gumming the spoon. I think that both of these actions really helped. By the next day, you would have thought he was an old pro as he ate every bit of his bananas. It didn't take long before he was readily opening for the spoon - and sometimes even lunging towards it. He "talks" about his food (I normally say "Mmmmm, yummy!" after he takes a bite. He responds with something that resembles "a-boo")
After about a week of bananas, we introduced avocados. He loves those as well and ate those for almost a week.
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| Yes! I want that bite of Avocado!!!! |
While we were serving bananas and avocados (which can just be mashed up with a fork), I spent some time making other foods to store in the freezer. I have butternut squash, pears, green beans, carrots, and peas all ready to go. I will be making some apples and sweet potatoes next. Making your own baby food really isn't that hard. To me, the hardest part is pushing them through a wire strainer - and we don't do this with every food - just the ones that have parts that don't puree well (peas and green beans as the skins are rather difficult to completely puree).
Yesterday, we started serving green beans and he seems to like those as well.
His first few attempts at feeding in the high chair didn't go too well. He didn't seem to like it very much. So, we would put him in there for a short time and would then move him to his bouncy seat. He no longer seems bothered by the high chair - he will use his hands to bang on the tray and he will grab for toys that I place on the tray for him to play with if he isn't eating. He will sit there and wait for me to bring his food and then will sit there contentedly for quite a while after he has finished his meal as well - especially if I give him some toys to play with.
And I have to say that even though it is partly sad that my baby is growing up so quickly and is now eating solid foods, I really do enjoy watching him enjoy the tastes of solid food.
Saturday, November 5, 2011
Boo! Er, Moooo!
As per my usual blogging, I am late posting. Again. This must be the new norm.
Regardless, here are some pictures of Carder on his first Halloween.
We got Carder dressed up in his costume for a quick photo shoot and then went Trick-Or-Treating to the next door neighbors (just to show someone his costume). Then he just answered the door with us to hand out candy.
Considering the fact that he had a hood over his head, he tolerated his costume pretty well.
Regardless, here are some pictures of Carder on his first Halloween.
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| You mean people are going to give me CANDY??? OK, what's the catch? |
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| Halloween on our front porch |
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| What has to be the World's Cutest Cow |
Considering the fact that he had a hood over his head, he tolerated his costume pretty well.
Friday, October 28, 2011
One Year Later
A year ago today, there was a hole in my heart and my arms were empty.
As I sat in the RE's office waiting on our transfer, I was hopeful but afraid to put too much pressure on the 2 tiny little embryos that were thawing in that petri dish in the back room.
So many things about this transfer were the same as previous transfers. Same office. Same waiting room. Same chair. Same Doctor. Same nurse.
Ironically, it was also exactly 1 year after our last transfer. (This is a fact that I did not realize until a few weeks ago when I was sorting through some old paperwork - or I probably would have scheduled a different date due to superstition).
I sat in that office listening to a meditation podcast and tried to remain calm and positive. And when the embryologist showed us the picture of those 2 beautiful little embryos, a smile was pasted on my face. I closed my eyes and pictured what life would be like when those embryos grew up with tears brimming in my eyes.
Today - 1 year later - my heart no longer feels as if there is a gaping hole. Instead, it swells with the love I feel for my little boy. My arms are no longer empty - I often find myself needing a 3rd or a 4th arm to be able to juggle everything. Our previously quiet, neat and tidy house is filled with the sounds of baby talk, laughter, squeals, and cries and is cluttered with baby toys and dirty burp cloths.
One year ago, I was afraid to believe that we would ever have a child. What a difference a year makes.
As I sat in the RE's office waiting on our transfer, I was hopeful but afraid to put too much pressure on the 2 tiny little embryos that were thawing in that petri dish in the back room.
So many things about this transfer were the same as previous transfers. Same office. Same waiting room. Same chair. Same Doctor. Same nurse.
Ironically, it was also exactly 1 year after our last transfer. (This is a fact that I did not realize until a few weeks ago when I was sorting through some old paperwork - or I probably would have scheduled a different date due to superstition).
I sat in that office listening to a meditation podcast and tried to remain calm and positive. And when the embryologist showed us the picture of those 2 beautiful little embryos, a smile was pasted on my face. I closed my eyes and pictured what life would be like when those embryos grew up with tears brimming in my eyes.
Today - 1 year later - my heart no longer feels as if there is a gaping hole. Instead, it swells with the love I feel for my little boy. My arms are no longer empty - I often find myself needing a 3rd or a 4th arm to be able to juggle everything. Our previously quiet, neat and tidy house is filled with the sounds of baby talk, laughter, squeals, and cries and is cluttered with baby toys and dirty burp cloths.
One year ago, I was afraid to believe that we would ever have a child. What a difference a year makes.
Tuesday, October 25, 2011
Hair - Part 2
Another Post About Hair. This time, however, it is about the unwanted kind.
Is it just me, or is my hair growing faster now that I am a mother? I know, logically, that it is because time seems to be moving so fast now. But, I can't seem to keep control of the unwanted hair.
It seems as if I shave the hair on my legs and armpits and the next day they are back and 1/4 of an inch long. But hairy legs and armpits aren't the biggest problem (after all, we are going into fall and winter and those unshaven areas are easily masked by pants and shirts).
My biggest problem is facial hair. Since Carder's birth, I have been trying to keep up with plucking the stray hairs in my eyebrows - you know, when you have a moment here or there in the bathroom and the baby is asleep. But the other day I looked and realized that some of the "stray hairs" had somehow worked their way into being an actual part of the eyebrow and I was beginning to look quite discheveled. (Or perhaps it has been this way for quite some time and I just realized it. Poor woman...Anyway...)
And then I realized that the few long, dark hairs that grew on my chin had somehow popped out and were disgustingly long. I knew that a date with my lighted magnifying mirror was long overdue. I spent Carder's afternoon nap plucking my way to looking halfway presentable.
And while I was using the mirror, I realized my "mustache" was also long overdue for some TLC as well. Previously, I used a hair removal cream but during pregnancy I was afraid to use any type of chemicals on my body and had resorted to just plucking the dark ones. So the other night, I decided to pull out the cream and get rid of my 'stache. I followed the directions exactly and removed the cream after 2 1/2 minutes. But a quick look in the mirror revealed 2 problems. The darkest ones stood strong against the cream and still had to be plucked. And, worse yet, somehow I ended up with a nasty chemical burn at the corners of my mouth. It was bad enough that Derek related it to Heath Ledger's appearance as the Joker in the Batman Movie...Thank God, the burn has finally healed. Unfortunately it is just in time for my 'stache to start growing back in - YAY!!!
My point is that between the spit up all over my clothes, the stray hairs falling out, the hair all over my body and my face, the bags under my eyes from sleep deprivation...It is a wonder that my husband even finds me remotely attractive anymore. Thankfully, he does.
And having Carder is worth having a unibrow, a mustache, and having the European look with all of my other body hair.
Is it just me, or is my hair growing faster now that I am a mother? I know, logically, that it is because time seems to be moving so fast now. But, I can't seem to keep control of the unwanted hair.
It seems as if I shave the hair on my legs and armpits and the next day they are back and 1/4 of an inch long. But hairy legs and armpits aren't the biggest problem (after all, we are going into fall and winter and those unshaven areas are easily masked by pants and shirts).
My biggest problem is facial hair. Since Carder's birth, I have been trying to keep up with plucking the stray hairs in my eyebrows - you know, when you have a moment here or there in the bathroom and the baby is asleep. But the other day I looked and realized that some of the "stray hairs" had somehow worked their way into being an actual part of the eyebrow and I was beginning to look quite discheveled. (Or perhaps it has been this way for quite some time and I just realized it. Poor woman...Anyway...)
And then I realized that the few long, dark hairs that grew on my chin had somehow popped out and were disgustingly long. I knew that a date with my lighted magnifying mirror was long overdue. I spent Carder's afternoon nap plucking my way to looking halfway presentable.
And while I was using the mirror, I realized my "mustache" was also long overdue for some TLC as well. Previously, I used a hair removal cream but during pregnancy I was afraid to use any type of chemicals on my body and had resorted to just plucking the dark ones. So the other night, I decided to pull out the cream and get rid of my 'stache. I followed the directions exactly and removed the cream after 2 1/2 minutes. But a quick look in the mirror revealed 2 problems. The darkest ones stood strong against the cream and still had to be plucked. And, worse yet, somehow I ended up with a nasty chemical burn at the corners of my mouth. It was bad enough that Derek related it to Heath Ledger's appearance as the Joker in the Batman Movie...Thank God, the burn has finally healed. Unfortunately it is just in time for my 'stache to start growing back in - YAY!!!
My point is that between the spit up all over my clothes, the stray hairs falling out, the hair all over my body and my face, the bags under my eyes from sleep deprivation...It is a wonder that my husband even finds me remotely attractive anymore. Thankfully, he does.
And having Carder is worth having a unibrow, a mustache, and having the European look with all of my other body hair.
Saturday, October 22, 2011
4 Months Old
My monthly posts seem to be running a little late each month - I like to wait for the pediatrician appointment to get his measurements for the post. That already has me a week behind. And then I typically have a baby who is a little fussy due to shots and I am even further behind...
At Four Months:
At Four Months:
- Weighs 14 pounds, 2 ounces
- Is 25 1/2 inches long
- Is wearing 3-6 Month Sized Clothing
- Is eating between 6-8 oz per feeding, 5 times per day
- Feedings are approximately 3 hours apart during the day
- Is consistently sleeping through the night (falls asleep around 9 or 10 and will sleep until 6 or 7 in the morning. Will often awaken during the night but will fall back asleep fairly easily
- Is now formula fed.
- Consistently smiles and coos.
- Is beginning to giggle a little bit.
- Has learned to blow his spit (think stick out tongue and blow) and it is his current favorite thing to do.
- Has discovered his feet and is enthralled with them.
- Helps out during diaper changes by putting his hands on his thighs and "holds" his legs.
- Loves to clasp his hands together below his chin (cutest thing ever...)
- Loves to lay in Mommy and Daddy's bed (always with close supervision)
- Still isn't the biggest fan of tummy time.
- Loves his swing and bouncy seat. Has recently learned that pulling the handle on the toy bar of the bouncy seat is what makes the music play and will pull the handle over and over.
- Just got a jumperoo and loves it, although he is still a little wobbly in it.
- Loves to stare at the ceiling fan, windows, lights.
- Is beginning to show a bit more interest in toys.
- Tolerates rides in car seat quite well
- Still sleeping partially swaddled at night (1 arm out) and we are working our way to no swaddling.
- Is wearing size 2 Disposable diapers or Newborn prefolds in the Size One Thirsties Duos.
Thanks to my friend Katie for the adorable onesie that Carder is wearing in his 4 month photos. He truly is a Dream Come True.
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| Spit Bubbles!!! |
Tuesday, October 11, 2011
Hair Club for Women
From other people's experiences IRL, I knew that I should probably expect some hair loss after pregnancy. I really never expected it to happen. And I certainly never expected it to be like this.
You see, I have always had baby fine hair. According to my stylist, I have lots of it but it just doesn't seem that way when you pull it into a ponytail since it is sooooo fine.
I had been told that during pregnancy, my hair would grow very fast and be full and luxurious. That never seemed to happen. In fact, my hair grew slower during pregnancy than it did pre-pregnancy. I never noticed it seeming fuller, although I did appreciate the fact that it seemed less oily.
In the last few weeks, I have been shocked at the amount of hair falling from my head. I am constantly finding it attached to my clothing, hanging from my hair, on Carder's clothing, wrapped around Carder's fingers, stuck to my bare feet from the floor...this stuff is everywhere. I am constantly pulling at that invisible hair that is tickling your face, arm, chest, neck, [insert body part here]...
When I wash my hair, it falls out by the handful in the shower. Even more of it comes out when I comb. When I blow dry, you can see it falling all around me and the brush gets full. I clean the bathroom floor every other day, but from the hair that comes up from the floor, one would think I haven't cleaned the floor since we moved in.
It is absolutely terrible. And according to Dr. Google, I can expect this phenomenon from 3-6 months postpartum - so- for up to the next 2 months. Good Times.
So, in retrospect, I guess my hair was more full during pregnancy. Either that or I need to sign up for Hair Club for Women because I am going bald.
You see, I have always had baby fine hair. According to my stylist, I have lots of it but it just doesn't seem that way when you pull it into a ponytail since it is sooooo fine.
I had been told that during pregnancy, my hair would grow very fast and be full and luxurious. That never seemed to happen. In fact, my hair grew slower during pregnancy than it did pre-pregnancy. I never noticed it seeming fuller, although I did appreciate the fact that it seemed less oily.
In the last few weeks, I have been shocked at the amount of hair falling from my head. I am constantly finding it attached to my clothing, hanging from my hair, on Carder's clothing, wrapped around Carder's fingers, stuck to my bare feet from the floor...this stuff is everywhere. I am constantly pulling at that invisible hair that is tickling your face, arm, chest, neck, [insert body part here]...
When I wash my hair, it falls out by the handful in the shower. Even more of it comes out when I comb. When I blow dry, you can see it falling all around me and the brush gets full. I clean the bathroom floor every other day, but from the hair that comes up from the floor, one would think I haven't cleaned the floor since we moved in.
It is absolutely terrible. And according to Dr. Google, I can expect this phenomenon from 3-6 months postpartum - so- for up to the next 2 months. Good Times.
So, in retrospect, I guess my hair was more full during pregnancy. Either that or I need to sign up for Hair Club for Women because I am going bald.
Saturday, October 1, 2011
Some Day, Some Way
A long, long time ago*, after almost 3 years of trying, Derek and I finally got pregnant. After such a long time trying, I was sure that our dreams were finally coming true. And then I lost the baby. I was having a hard time dealing with the loss of this child and I began to search for solice online.
I found a website called Babycenter and I joined. At first, I only participated in groups about loss and miscarraige. I tried but couldn't stand the groups that were for people who were actively trying - there were so many people there who got pregnant their first try and it was so hard to stay positive when you felt as if you were the only one who was struggling to conceive a child.
And then I found a group of women who had been trying to conceive for one year or more. It was if I had found an online home. I made friends with these women quickly and I found a support system unlike one I had ever known. I bonded with these women and formed some extremely strong relationships. We mourned failed cycles and losses together. And we celebrated successes together. I love these women. Although it has been several years now and we no longer post in our BBC group, we still keep in touch. We have had 2 get togethers where we travelled across the US to meet each other. And I hope we have more of these in the future.
For a while now, I have wanted to post about this group of women. One of them - Katie - coined a phrase that we quoted to each other frequently. "Some day, some way." There were times that this phrase was all that kept me believing that some day my dreams would come true. I held on to this phrase with all of my might in failed cycle after failed cycle. It became my mantra.
And now - for almost all of us - this mantra has come true. Most of us are now mothers or are expecting our first child (and are far enough into the pregnancy that I feel as if I can post this without jinxing anyone). For us, our Some Day, Some Way has finally come true. I look over at Carder who is sleeping like an angel in his swing and I feel so lucky that my dreams have finally come true. (And we lived happily ever after.**)
But there are still 2 of us for whom our dreams haven't manifested into reality. For them, the strain of infertilty broke them and their marraiges.
For one of these ladies, she and her husband had decided to pursue adoption. They were quickly picked by a birth mother who was expecting twins. She allowed herself to imagine the future with these babies and felt peace and happiness. And shortly after being matched, her marraige fell apart. Not only did she have to say goodbye to her husband - a relationship that had been over a decade of her life - but she had to give up her current version of her dream of motherhood. Over the last couple of years, she has dealt with so many feelings of loss. And in the last few weeks, she has been dealing with the feelings over having to pass up the chance to be a mother to the twins.
For you, my dear friend, I want to remind you that your "Some Day, Some Way" will still happen. It won't happen with the man you began your journey with. And it won't be with the twins you loved the moment you learned of them. But it WILL happen. And you will be a wonderful mother. Never forget that "Some Day, Some Way" will find you when it is meant to be.
For you, my readers, this post is twofold. Please remember my friend and send some loving thoughts out to her, even if all you do is think something kind because you don't know who she is. In addition, if you are still trying for your miracle, don't give up hope that your "Some Day, Some Way" will happen. Whether you conceive naturally, through IUI, or through IVF - or whether you adopt embryos or a baby - one day your hearts and your arms will be full.
*Yes, this story begins like so many Fairy Tales.
**I guess you could say it ends like a Fairy Tale, too!
I found a website called Babycenter and I joined. At first, I only participated in groups about loss and miscarraige. I tried but couldn't stand the groups that were for people who were actively trying - there were so many people there who got pregnant their first try and it was so hard to stay positive when you felt as if you were the only one who was struggling to conceive a child.
And then I found a group of women who had been trying to conceive for one year or more. It was if I had found an online home. I made friends with these women quickly and I found a support system unlike one I had ever known. I bonded with these women and formed some extremely strong relationships. We mourned failed cycles and losses together. And we celebrated successes together. I love these women. Although it has been several years now and we no longer post in our BBC group, we still keep in touch. We have had 2 get togethers where we travelled across the US to meet each other. And I hope we have more of these in the future.
For a while now, I have wanted to post about this group of women. One of them - Katie - coined a phrase that we quoted to each other frequently. "Some day, some way." There were times that this phrase was all that kept me believing that some day my dreams would come true. I held on to this phrase with all of my might in failed cycle after failed cycle. It became my mantra.
And now - for almost all of us - this mantra has come true. Most of us are now mothers or are expecting our first child (and are far enough into the pregnancy that I feel as if I can post this without jinxing anyone). For us, our Some Day, Some Way has finally come true. I look over at Carder who is sleeping like an angel in his swing and I feel so lucky that my dreams have finally come true. (And we lived happily ever after.**)
But there are still 2 of us for whom our dreams haven't manifested into reality. For them, the strain of infertilty broke them and their marraiges.
For one of these ladies, she and her husband had decided to pursue adoption. They were quickly picked by a birth mother who was expecting twins. She allowed herself to imagine the future with these babies and felt peace and happiness. And shortly after being matched, her marraige fell apart. Not only did she have to say goodbye to her husband - a relationship that had been over a decade of her life - but she had to give up her current version of her dream of motherhood. Over the last couple of years, she has dealt with so many feelings of loss. And in the last few weeks, she has been dealing with the feelings over having to pass up the chance to be a mother to the twins.
For you, my dear friend, I want to remind you that your "Some Day, Some Way" will still happen. It won't happen with the man you began your journey with. And it won't be with the twins you loved the moment you learned of them. But it WILL happen. And you will be a wonderful mother. Never forget that "Some Day, Some Way" will find you when it is meant to be.
For you, my readers, this post is twofold. Please remember my friend and send some loving thoughts out to her, even if all you do is think something kind because you don't know who she is. In addition, if you are still trying for your miracle, don't give up hope that your "Some Day, Some Way" will happen. Whether you conceive naturally, through IUI, or through IVF - or whether you adopt embryos or a baby - one day your hearts and your arms will be full.
*Yes, this story begins like so many Fairy Tales.
**I guess you could say it ends like a Fairy Tale, too!
Monday, September 19, 2011
Hi Ho, Hi Ho, It's Back to Work I Go
I started back to work last week on September 13.
Going back wasn't as rough as I had thought it would be. I was afraid that I would spend the entire first week in tears. I guess I cried enough in the weeks leading up to it that I didn't have very many tears left. Okay, so I teared up a little, but I put on my big girl panties, sucked it up, and managed to act like a professional about it. After all, I am still just working part time (Tues - Thurs) and I am getting to be home with him the majority of the week.
It was nice to spend some time having adult conversations without having to worry that the baby would cry and interrupt the conversation. It was nice using my brain to do something besides to calculate the scoops of dry formula needed for 12 ounces of water (or to count those scoops).
Did I miss my baby? Absolutely. Terribly. Couldn't get home fast enough.
But it wasn't as bad as I had thought it would be.
Tuesday was rough - he was asleep when I got home and was a bit fussy. That was probably the worst part of all of it - wanting to enjoy the time I did have with him and having him not be in the best of moods made me cry a little bit. Wednesday was better - he was awake when I got home and (as I previously posted) waited for me to come home to roll over.
But the best part of the week? Thursday evening when I arrived home, my MIL was burping him on her shoulder. When I walked in and spoke to him, his eyes lit up and he gave me this big huge grin. It was almost as if he was saying "Mommy! I missed you and I am so happy to see you!" It totally made my day away from him worth it.
In Day Care news, my in-laws did a great job watching him. BUT, our day care called on Friday and they now have a spot for us. The in-laws will be watching him this week and next week and then he will begin going to the day care. Although I know my in-laws are not ecstatic about this - they were, after all, looking forward to spending all that time with him - they understand that we can't pass it up. And, I think that it is a good development. I think that having the day care will alleviate the resentment and jealousy I was feeling and will prevent the destruction of my relationship with them.
Hopefully, this week will go just as smoothly as last week did.
Going back wasn't as rough as I had thought it would be. I was afraid that I would spend the entire first week in tears. I guess I cried enough in the weeks leading up to it that I didn't have very many tears left. Okay, so I teared up a little, but I put on my big girl panties, sucked it up, and managed to act like a professional about it. After all, I am still just working part time (Tues - Thurs) and I am getting to be home with him the majority of the week.
It was nice to spend some time having adult conversations without having to worry that the baby would cry and interrupt the conversation. It was nice using my brain to do something besides to calculate the scoops of dry formula needed for 12 ounces of water (or to count those scoops).
Did I miss my baby? Absolutely. Terribly. Couldn't get home fast enough.
But it wasn't as bad as I had thought it would be.
Tuesday was rough - he was asleep when I got home and was a bit fussy. That was probably the worst part of all of it - wanting to enjoy the time I did have with him and having him not be in the best of moods made me cry a little bit. Wednesday was better - he was awake when I got home and (as I previously posted) waited for me to come home to roll over.
But the best part of the week? Thursday evening when I arrived home, my MIL was burping him on her shoulder. When I walked in and spoke to him, his eyes lit up and he gave me this big huge grin. It was almost as if he was saying "Mommy! I missed you and I am so happy to see you!" It totally made my day away from him worth it.
In Day Care news, my in-laws did a great job watching him. BUT, our day care called on Friday and they now have a spot for us. The in-laws will be watching him this week and next week and then he will begin going to the day care. Although I know my in-laws are not ecstatic about this - they were, after all, looking forward to spending all that time with him - they understand that we can't pass it up. And, I think that it is a good development. I think that having the day care will alleviate the resentment and jealousy I was feeling and will prevent the destruction of my relationship with them.
Hopefully, this week will go just as smoothly as last week did.
3 Months Old
This post is a little late...
At Three Months:
Weighs around 12 1/2 pounds (at home weigh in)
Is about 24 1/2 inches long (at home measurement)
Is wearing 0-3 Month Sized Clothing but is beginning to look like a bruiser in them. 3-6 month sizes are just around the corner
Is eating between 5-6 oz per day, 6 times per day
Feedings are approximately 3 hours apart during the day
Is consistently sleeping through the night (falls asleep around 9 or 10 and will sleep until 6 or 7 in the morning. Will often awaken during the night but will fall back asleep fairly easily - if only Mommy could fall back asleep that easily).
Is currently getting a combination of breast milk and formula. All feedings are by bottle. Breast milk is being phased out as Mommy is returning to work.
Consistently smiles big gummy grins at us.
Coos on a regular basis. Will coo at family or at items he likes. Makes vowel sounds and is beginning to combine consonant and vowel sounds together.
Loves to sleep on Mommy's or Daddy's chest
Loves to lay in Mommy and Daddy's bed (always with close supervision)
Is getting better at tummy time now that Mommy is putting a rolled up towel under his arms.
Loves his swing, both side to side and front to back.
Loves his bouncy seat.
Loves to stare at the ceiling fan, windows, lights. He still doesn't play with his toys very much, but is beginning to show interest in certain items. He has a monkey that he likes to hold and chew on.
Tolerates rides in car seat quite well
Prefers not to be swaddled (he likes to have his arms near his head) but sleeps better when swaddled. When not swaddled, Moro reflex wakens him often. Sleeps at night swaddled, but will work his arms out of the swaddling when he wakes up.
Is wearing size 1 Disposable diapers or Newborn prefolds in the Size One Thirsties Duos.
At Three Months:
Weighs around 12 1/2 pounds (at home weigh in)
Is about 24 1/2 inches long (at home measurement)
Is wearing 0-3 Month Sized Clothing but is beginning to look like a bruiser in them. 3-6 month sizes are just around the corner
Is eating between 5-6 oz per day, 6 times per day
Feedings are approximately 3 hours apart during the day
Is consistently sleeping through the night (falls asleep around 9 or 10 and will sleep until 6 or 7 in the morning. Will often awaken during the night but will fall back asleep fairly easily - if only Mommy could fall back asleep that easily).
Is currently getting a combination of breast milk and formula. All feedings are by bottle. Breast milk is being phased out as Mommy is returning to work.
Consistently smiles big gummy grins at us.
Coos on a regular basis. Will coo at family or at items he likes. Makes vowel sounds and is beginning to combine consonant and vowel sounds together.
Loves to sleep on Mommy's or Daddy's chest
Loves to lay in Mommy and Daddy's bed (always with close supervision)
Is getting better at tummy time now that Mommy is putting a rolled up towel under his arms.
Loves his swing, both side to side and front to back.
Loves his bouncy seat.
Loves to stare at the ceiling fan, windows, lights. He still doesn't play with his toys very much, but is beginning to show interest in certain items. He has a monkey that he likes to hold and chew on.
Tolerates rides in car seat quite well
Prefers not to be swaddled (he likes to have his arms near his head) but sleeps better when swaddled. When not swaddled, Moro reflex wakens him often. Sleeps at night swaddled, but will work his arms out of the swaddling when he wakes up.
Is wearing size 1 Disposable diapers or Newborn prefolds in the Size One Thirsties Duos.
Wednesday, September 14, 2011
Rolling Over - Tummy to Back
I am one proud Mommy. Tonight, during tummy time, Carder rolled over from his tummy to his back!!! He is 3 months and 1 week, so this was right on time. Derek and I were both home and watching him when he did this.
About 2 weeks ago, I began using a rolled up towel under his arms during tummy time. This extra height made his view more interesting and he began to tolerate a little longer stretches. And, as he learned that tummy time was more interesting if he looked up, he began lifting his head even higher during tummy time (even without the towel) and is supporting himself on his arms.
Over the last 2 weeks - as you can imagine- Carder's head control during tummy time has greatly improved. This is also been the result of carrying him upright on my shoulder - he loves being able to look around and prefers to be held this way - so he is getting really good at being able to control his head this way as well.
This, coupled with the fact that he was beginning to lean a bit to one side or the other occasionally during tummy time, was leading me to believe that he would be reaching this milestone before much longer. I am so glad that I didn't miss it.
About 2 weeks ago, I began using a rolled up towel under his arms during tummy time. This extra height made his view more interesting and he began to tolerate a little longer stretches. And, as he learned that tummy time was more interesting if he looked up, he began lifting his head even higher during tummy time (even without the towel) and is supporting himself on his arms.
Over the last 2 weeks - as you can imagine- Carder's head control during tummy time has greatly improved. This is also been the result of carrying him upright on my shoulder - he loves being able to look around and prefers to be held this way - so he is getting really good at being able to control his head this way as well.
This, coupled with the fact that he was beginning to lean a bit to one side or the other occasionally during tummy time, was leading me to believe that he would be reaching this milestone before much longer. I am so glad that I didn't miss it.
Wednesday, September 7, 2011
Counting Down the Days
In more ways than one.
Returning to work
And Not in A Good Way...
A while back, I posted about my options about returning to work vs. staying at home. I never posted my decision about what to do, but in a nutshell, I decided to return to my part time job and turn down the contract work for my old employer. My part time job gave me a return to work date of September 13. This was longer than the typical 12 weeks of maternity leave, and for that I am very thankful.
But it isn't nearly enough time. But I guess the million dollar question would be "Is there ever enough time???"
I have thought about not going back at all - and Derek has said it is an option - but I think in the long run it will be a good thing for me to return to working. The extra income will be nice, having adult interaction will be nice, exercising my brain will be a welcome change. I just have to get past the first couple of weeks and the initial shock of leaving my baby for longer than an hour. I am not expecting those first couple of weeks to go well for me emotionally. Fully expect some "Woe is Me" posts next week (if I decide I can tear myself away from my baby for long enough to post).
Of course, the only negative about returning to work isn't just being away from my baby. The day care we are going to take Carder to doesn't have space for him until January at the earliest, so we need an interim day care. Since we are new to the area, we have had a tough time finding suitable day care with availability. Derek's Mom has been nice enough to offer to drive up (a 2.5 hour trip each way) to stay with him for me to return to work for the interim. Of course, for her point of view, this is a wonderful opportunity to spend some great quality time with her grandson and she is super excited about it. Me? Notsomuch. I HATE THIS. Let me clarify. I would hate this even if it was MY MOM keeping him. I know, I know. I should be thankful that someone who loves him will be keeping him - and I am. But I am feeling very jealous and resentful. But Carder is just beginning to develop a personality. He is now smiling back at us and is beginning to interact with us on a more frequent basis. New developments aren't far behind. I am scared I won't get to see some of these firsts - that she will (Note to self, spell it out to her NOT to tell me if I miss something - let me believe that I get to see all of it first).
While I am being honest, I might as well admit that - as stupid as this fear is - I am worried that Carder will bond with her more than he has with me and that she will be so much better at "mothering" him than I am. Realistically, I know that this is a ridiculous fear to have. Yet, it is there - bubbling below the surface and waiting to rear it's ugly head.
And what if she is super mom? What if I come home from work and she has not only taken care of Carder but also cleaned the house and cooked dinner? I have been doing my best, but I struggle to get it all done. And it damn sure doesn't all get done on the same day. If I clean the house, we have leftovers or PB&J for dinner. What if she can do it all and puts me to shame?
Between these reasons and the fact that we will have house guests at least 3 nights a week EVERY SINGLE WEEK, I have really been dreading returning to work. Panic attack, can't breathe, night sweats dreaded returning to work.
She and I did have a conversation last night about my feelings about her watching Carder. I was mostly honest (I didn't give her all the details about how I was feeling) and I have apologized in advance for any attitude sent her way during this transition period. I am trying to keep a lid on any resentment or jealousy I am feeling, but I have never been good at that sort of thing. Hopefully we can get through this period without me being such a bitch that I ruin the relationship I have with my MIL over her doing something NICE FOR US. I really hope so.
Breastfeeding
And in a Love/Hate sort of way.
I haven't updated on the BFing situation in a while.
After weeks and weeks of pumping at every single feeding, Carder began to out eat my production. Once I started having to supplement with formula and made the decision that I would be returning to work, I decided that I was going to cut out my night time pumpings. And then I cut down to 3 times per day. And now to 2 times per day. For the last couple of weeks, I have been supplying about 1/2 of what he eats through the 2 daily pumpings.
But, with returning to work, I have been weighing out what to do with the BFing. One part of me thinks that continuing to provide breast milk would be a wonderful thing to do for Carder. But the other part of me looks at the hour it would take me to pump on the days I work and I really don't want to spend that time attached to a machine when I could be spending that time with him, even if it is just staring down at him while he is sleeping.
In addition, in planning out how my mornings will work, I would have to get up extra early just to pump then would have to pump again as soon as I got home from work. I know that I could ask my MIL to take the morning feeding and the evening feeding and I could pump while she feeds him and she would gladly do this. But if I were to do that, there is a good chance I would only get to feed him one time per day on the days I work.
So, I think that I am going to throw in the towel on BFing.
It will be nice to not have to be attached to the machine anymore. It will be nice to be able to feed Carder and then get on with my day or go on to bed. It will be nice to have Carder on straight formula - it will make it so much easier to plan an outing - no need to keep a bottle cold or figure out how to warm it up. And, selfishly, it will be nice to be able to drink coffee and wine again.
Our breastfeeding journey was never what I had hoped it would be. I still feel pangs of regret when I see someone breastfeeding their child and I don't know if that will ever go away. If things had started out differently, perhaps my decision for moving forward would be different. And yet, even as I type this post, I find myself wondering how I could make it work to continue to provide him with breast milk. Could I do just one pumping per day? Could I keep up my 2 a day routine? Or would my sanity be better if I just gave it up completely??? And I think that cutting out the pumping makes the most sense, regardless of the way that giving up is making me feel. Because it is what it is.
So there you have it. Counting down the days. Less than a week to go.
Returning to work
And Not in A Good Way...
A while back, I posted about my options about returning to work vs. staying at home. I never posted my decision about what to do, but in a nutshell, I decided to return to my part time job and turn down the contract work for my old employer. My part time job gave me a return to work date of September 13. This was longer than the typical 12 weeks of maternity leave, and for that I am very thankful.
But it isn't nearly enough time. But I guess the million dollar question would be "Is there ever enough time???"
I have thought about not going back at all - and Derek has said it is an option - but I think in the long run it will be a good thing for me to return to working. The extra income will be nice, having adult interaction will be nice, exercising my brain will be a welcome change. I just have to get past the first couple of weeks and the initial shock of leaving my baby for longer than an hour. I am not expecting those first couple of weeks to go well for me emotionally. Fully expect some "Woe is Me" posts next week (if I decide I can tear myself away from my baby for long enough to post).
Of course, the only negative about returning to work isn't just being away from my baby. The day care we are going to take Carder to doesn't have space for him until January at the earliest, so we need an interim day care. Since we are new to the area, we have had a tough time finding suitable day care with availability. Derek's Mom has been nice enough to offer to drive up (a 2.5 hour trip each way) to stay with him for me to return to work for the interim. Of course, for her point of view, this is a wonderful opportunity to spend some great quality time with her grandson and she is super excited about it. Me? Notsomuch. I HATE THIS. Let me clarify. I would hate this even if it was MY MOM keeping him. I know, I know. I should be thankful that someone who loves him will be keeping him - and I am. But I am feeling very jealous and resentful. But Carder is just beginning to develop a personality. He is now smiling back at us and is beginning to interact with us on a more frequent basis. New developments aren't far behind. I am scared I won't get to see some of these firsts - that she will (Note to self, spell it out to her NOT to tell me if I miss something - let me believe that I get to see all of it first).
While I am being honest, I might as well admit that - as stupid as this fear is - I am worried that Carder will bond with her more than he has with me and that she will be so much better at "mothering" him than I am. Realistically, I know that this is a ridiculous fear to have. Yet, it is there - bubbling below the surface and waiting to rear it's ugly head.
And what if she is super mom? What if I come home from work and she has not only taken care of Carder but also cleaned the house and cooked dinner? I have been doing my best, but I struggle to get it all done. And it damn sure doesn't all get done on the same day. If I clean the house, we have leftovers or PB&J for dinner. What if she can do it all and puts me to shame?
Between these reasons and the fact that we will have house guests at least 3 nights a week EVERY SINGLE WEEK, I have really been dreading returning to work. Panic attack, can't breathe, night sweats dreaded returning to work.
She and I did have a conversation last night about my feelings about her watching Carder. I was mostly honest (I didn't give her all the details about how I was feeling) and I have apologized in advance for any attitude sent her way during this transition period. I am trying to keep a lid on any resentment or jealousy I am feeling, but I have never been good at that sort of thing. Hopefully we can get through this period without me being such a bitch that I ruin the relationship I have with my MIL over her doing something NICE FOR US. I really hope so.
Breastfeeding
And in a Love/Hate sort of way.
I haven't updated on the BFing situation in a while.
After weeks and weeks of pumping at every single feeding, Carder began to out eat my production. Once I started having to supplement with formula and made the decision that I would be returning to work, I decided that I was going to cut out my night time pumpings. And then I cut down to 3 times per day. And now to 2 times per day. For the last couple of weeks, I have been supplying about 1/2 of what he eats through the 2 daily pumpings.
But, with returning to work, I have been weighing out what to do with the BFing. One part of me thinks that continuing to provide breast milk would be a wonderful thing to do for Carder. But the other part of me looks at the hour it would take me to pump on the days I work and I really don't want to spend that time attached to a machine when I could be spending that time with him, even if it is just staring down at him while he is sleeping.
In addition, in planning out how my mornings will work, I would have to get up extra early just to pump then would have to pump again as soon as I got home from work. I know that I could ask my MIL to take the morning feeding and the evening feeding and I could pump while she feeds him and she would gladly do this. But if I were to do that, there is a good chance I would only get to feed him one time per day on the days I work.
So, I think that I am going to throw in the towel on BFing.
It will be nice to not have to be attached to the machine anymore. It will be nice to be able to feed Carder and then get on with my day or go on to bed. It will be nice to have Carder on straight formula - it will make it so much easier to plan an outing - no need to keep a bottle cold or figure out how to warm it up. And, selfishly, it will be nice to be able to drink coffee and wine again.
Our breastfeeding journey was never what I had hoped it would be. I still feel pangs of regret when I see someone breastfeeding their child and I don't know if that will ever go away. If things had started out differently, perhaps my decision for moving forward would be different. And yet, even as I type this post, I find myself wondering how I could make it work to continue to provide him with breast milk. Could I do just one pumping per day? Could I keep up my 2 a day routine? Or would my sanity be better if I just gave it up completely??? And I think that cutting out the pumping makes the most sense, regardless of the way that giving up is making me feel. Because it is what it is.
So there you have it. Counting down the days. Less than a week to go.
Wednesday, August 31, 2011
Thursday, August 25, 2011
Double
This weekend, Carder's eye started watering and began to have some yellowish discharge. On Tuesday, I took him to the Pediatrician to get it checked out. When they weighed him, he was 11 pounds 6 ounces. He has officially doubled his birth weight. I am super proud of him. His weight is now in the 25th percentile.
We didn't see our normal pediatrician as he was on vacation, but the substitute doctor was very nice. She determined that he might have an infection in his eye or it could be a clogged tear duct. Either way, we got some eye drops just in case and it is clearing up nicely.
I also revisited the acid reflux conversation with the Doctor. As you may remember, we discontinued the usage of the Zantac for a few days due to the fact that Carder's appetite had dropped drastically after the immunizations and starting the Zantac. We did attempt to start it back - and the feedings immediately followings the doses of Zantac were TERRIBLE. I began to wonder if the Zantac was making the issue worse. When I discussed this with the Pediatrician, she said that it was possible. She went over his symptoms again and said that he could have Acid Reflux. However, since the symptoms aren't flaring up at every feeding and the medication didn't seem to be improving anything, she thought we should hold off on giving it to him for a while.
The good news is that the "bad feedings" seem to have lightened up a little bit, as have the spit ups followed by crying. We discussed the possibility that perhaps part of his discomfort could be from the type of formula we are supplementing with. I had originally just associated it with when be began eating more, but when he began eating more was when we began supplementing more as well - so the symptoms began to get worse when we started upping the amount of supplementation She suggested that we try the soy based formula to see if it that made a difference in his comfort level. We have been using Neosure - a formula specifically formulated for preemies that has a couple extra calories per ounce - but since his growth has been catching up, she thinks we could forgo those extra calories at this point. Part of me is ready to make the switch, but another part of me wants to hold off and continue giving him those extra calories for a couple more weeks. It is difficult to know which is better - the extra calories or a possible better/worse tolerance for a new formula.
We didn't see our normal pediatrician as he was on vacation, but the substitute doctor was very nice. She determined that he might have an infection in his eye or it could be a clogged tear duct. Either way, we got some eye drops just in case and it is clearing up nicely.
I also revisited the acid reflux conversation with the Doctor. As you may remember, we discontinued the usage of the Zantac for a few days due to the fact that Carder's appetite had dropped drastically after the immunizations and starting the Zantac. We did attempt to start it back - and the feedings immediately followings the doses of Zantac were TERRIBLE. I began to wonder if the Zantac was making the issue worse. When I discussed this with the Pediatrician, she said that it was possible. She went over his symptoms again and said that he could have Acid Reflux. However, since the symptoms aren't flaring up at every feeding and the medication didn't seem to be improving anything, she thought we should hold off on giving it to him for a while.
The good news is that the "bad feedings" seem to have lightened up a little bit, as have the spit ups followed by crying. We discussed the possibility that perhaps part of his discomfort could be from the type of formula we are supplementing with. I had originally just associated it with when be began eating more, but when he began eating more was when we began supplementing more as well - so the symptoms began to get worse when we started upping the amount of supplementation She suggested that we try the soy based formula to see if it that made a difference in his comfort level. We have been using Neosure - a formula specifically formulated for preemies that has a couple extra calories per ounce - but since his growth has been catching up, she thinks we could forgo those extra calories at this point. Part of me is ready to make the switch, but another part of me wants to hold off and continue giving him those extra calories for a couple more weeks. It is difficult to know which is better - the extra calories or a possible better/worse tolerance for a new formula.
Sunday, August 21, 2011
What Do Fresh Mozzerella and Ovaries have in Common???
Derek and I were preparing some fresh mozzarella over tomatoes. The grocery store was out of the type of mozzarella that we normally buy, so Derek had bought a ball of mozzarella pearls - small balls of mozzarella smushed together into a large ball.
As he was slicing the ball of cheese, Derek said "I bet this is what your ovaries looked like while you were stimming. And it is probably about the right size."
Up until then, I hadn't really looked at the ball of cheese. But when I did, I realized that he was spot on with the comparison. The resemblance was uncanny.
I wonder if anyone (who isn't an RE or infertile) has ever made that comparison before.
As he was slicing the ball of cheese, Derek said "I bet this is what your ovaries looked like while you were stimming. And it is probably about the right size."
Up until then, I hadn't really looked at the ball of cheese. But when I did, I realized that he was spot on with the comparison. The resemblance was uncanny.
I wonder if anyone (who isn't an RE or infertile) has ever made that comparison before.
Friday, August 19, 2011
Sleeping Through the Night???
Wednesday night, Carder switched up his schedule on us a bit - he had his normal 7:30ish feeding. Typically, after that feeding, he will do a play/nap combo and will wake up sometime between 10:30 and 11:30 for his next feeding. But on Wednesday, at 9:15, he got very fussy and was attacking his pacifier like he hadn't eaten all day. So I went ahead and fed him again. Since his nigh time pattern has been to eat about 4-5 hours later, I figured that he would be waking up sometime around 1 or 2 for his next feeding. I pumped and headed on to bed, expecting to be awakened in the middle of the night.
I woke up at 3 am, realized the time, worried why he hadn't woken up to eat yet, checked to make sure he was breathing and then headed back to bed. He didn't waken until 4:15 for his next feeding. That was 7 hours after his previous feeding. He slept for 6+ hours. I got 4 1/2 hours of sleep - the most continuous sleep I have had since he came home from the hospital. It was marvelous.
I cautiously told my mom and a couple of friends about this development - entirely convinced that this was a fluke and that it wouldn't be occurring again for a while. This statement was, of course, followed by knocking on wood...
Last night, after his 7:30ish feeding, he showed signs of hunger again at about 10:20. After feeding him, he was wide awake. I had already pumped, but decided to attempt to put him to bed and get some sleep. I swaddled the wide eyed little man and walked out of the room for a minute. I came back to a baby sleeping soundly and crawled into bed. I think I was asleep the moment my head hit the pillow.
Imagine my surprise when there was a repeat performance of another 7 hour stretch and he didn't awake until almost 5:20 this morning for his next feeding.
I may have a baby who is sleeping through the night. (Knock Knock Knock on some wood)
I have to tell you - sleep is a wonderful thing. I feel refreshed. I can actually remember why I walked into a room. Heck, I can even remember my own name now. (Sleep deprivation has not been nice to me, people.)
But as nice as this is, it is tainted with sadness. It brings with it the realization that my baby is growing up. Quickly. Before I know it he will be running around, opening up cabinets and emptying their contents on the floor before flushing something valuable down the toilet. He won't be this cuddly little boy who loves to sleep in my arms and who stares deeply into my eyes while I feed him much longer. And as much as I am cherishing every moment of sleep, a part of me is sad to see that he is growing up so quickly. It reminds me that I need to stop watching TV while I feed him - I need to drink in every moment that he is staring into my eyes as he eats so that I don't miss it. I need to take more pictures of him at this age. I need to make sure there are more pictures of he and I together so that I can look back and remember just how it was. And I need to stop typing this section of this post before I get too emotional - the tears are already welling in my eyes...
I woke up at 3 am, realized the time, worried why he hadn't woken up to eat yet, checked to make sure he was breathing and then headed back to bed. He didn't waken until 4:15 for his next feeding. That was 7 hours after his previous feeding. He slept for 6+ hours. I got 4 1/2 hours of sleep - the most continuous sleep I have had since he came home from the hospital. It was marvelous.
I cautiously told my mom and a couple of friends about this development - entirely convinced that this was a fluke and that it wouldn't be occurring again for a while. This statement was, of course, followed by knocking on wood...
Last night, after his 7:30ish feeding, he showed signs of hunger again at about 10:20. After feeding him, he was wide awake. I had already pumped, but decided to attempt to put him to bed and get some sleep. I swaddled the wide eyed little man and walked out of the room for a minute. I came back to a baby sleeping soundly and crawled into bed. I think I was asleep the moment my head hit the pillow.
Imagine my surprise when there was a repeat performance of another 7 hour stretch and he didn't awake until almost 5:20 this morning for his next feeding.
I may have a baby who is sleeping through the night. (Knock Knock Knock on some wood)
I have to tell you - sleep is a wonderful thing. I feel refreshed. I can actually remember why I walked into a room. Heck, I can even remember my own name now. (Sleep deprivation has not been nice to me, people.)
But as nice as this is, it is tainted with sadness. It brings with it the realization that my baby is growing up. Quickly. Before I know it he will be running around, opening up cabinets and emptying their contents on the floor before flushing something valuable down the toilet. He won't be this cuddly little boy who loves to sleep in my arms and who stares deeply into my eyes while I feed him much longer. And as much as I am cherishing every moment of sleep, a part of me is sad to see that he is growing up so quickly. It reminds me that I need to stop watching TV while I feed him - I need to drink in every moment that he is staring into my eyes as he eats so that I don't miss it. I need to take more pictures of him at this age. I need to make sure there are more pictures of he and I together so that I can look back and remember just how it was. And I need to stop typing this section of this post before I get too emotional - the tears are already welling in my eyes...
Monday, August 15, 2011
Well Child, Vaccines, and Reflux
On Thursday, we had Carder's 2 month Well Child Check up. The doctor is very happy with his growth and development. There are a couple of 2 month milestones that Carder is meeting that his pedi is very happy about. Due to his prematurity, some of these milestones may come a bit later for Carder than for some other babies. Each situation is different and we will just have to be patient to see which milestones he meets on time and which ones are delayed. His weight gain has been good - he has gone from barely being on the growth charts for his weight to being in the 10th percentile. The doctor seemed to think that by 6 months, his growth will have caught up. We are crossing our fingers that the doctor is right.
I was dreading the vaccinations terribly. From a few face plants on our chests, I already knew that I don't like the sound of the wail my baby makes when he is in pain. Derek already had his orders that he was to do any holding down necessary. Carder took his oral vaccine like a champ (although part of it did get spit onto the Nurse). He also took his 3 injections very well. He wailed in pain, but nuzzled into my chest and clung to me closely for comfort from the pain. Derek said that it was really very cute. It still broke my heart to hear him cry.
Just before Carder's 2 month Pediatrician appointment, he began having a few symptoms that concerned me. He had begun eating quite a bit more at each feeding, but the amount of spit up had increased as well. In addition, towards the end of the feeding, he began crying while being fed. This alarmed us both. After discussing these changes with the Pediatrician, it was determined that he probably has acid reflux. This isn't what I had hoped to hear - after all, I have several friends who have suffered through reflux hell. I got his prescription for Zantac filled that day and started giving him the meds that night. I don't know how much of the first few doses that he got - he spit quite a bit of them back out. I tasted the medicine and figured out that perhaps it needed to be flavored. The pharmacy then flavored the medicine, but I don't think it tastes any better. It actually may taste worse now. Anyway, I have been putting the medication further back in his mouth and I think he is getting more of it now.
BUT
Since the vaccines, Carder's appetite has decreased drastically. He went from eating 5 ounces at almost every feeding to eating barely 3. And the crying at the end of a feeding hasn't improved much, if at all. Derek isn't convinced that he has reflux (but he doesn't see every single feeding like I do) and he thinks we shouldn't be giving Carder medication if he doesn't need it. I agree that we shouldn't use a medication if we don't need it, but at the same time, I know that he can't quite tell us if it hurts.
And I know that something isn't right. Babies don't cry at the end of a bottle unless it is empty and they are still hungry. Carder is crying with the bottle in his mouth while there is still plenty there AFTER he has finished an ounce or more. And I also know from reading the stories of other moms online that NOT treating reflux can have terrible outcomes as the baby begins to avoid feedings due to the pain.
I wish that I had waited to start the medication until after the vaccines had a few days to get out of his system, that way I would know if the decrease in appetite was a side effect of the vaccine or the Zantac.
I did put in a call to the Pediatrician today to get his input on what could be causing the decrease in appetite. He indicated it could be either the vaccines or the Zantac and he said we should stop using the Zantac for a few days to see if the amount of feeding increases and then to call them back with an update. Since the immunization side effects should be wearing off any time now, I don't really know what this will accomplish - other than delaying the medication from helping him if it is going to.
I am going to go with the Pediatrician's recommendation to stop the Zantac for now. And I am going to do some more research online. However, if the crying at the end of a feeding doesn't get any better, I am going to schedule another visit with the Pediatrician to see if we can get to the bottom of this before it gets worse or before the damage is irreparable.
I was dreading the vaccinations terribly. From a few face plants on our chests, I already knew that I don't like the sound of the wail my baby makes when he is in pain. Derek already had his orders that he was to do any holding down necessary. Carder took his oral vaccine like a champ (although part of it did get spit onto the Nurse). He also took his 3 injections very well. He wailed in pain, but nuzzled into my chest and clung to me closely for comfort from the pain. Derek said that it was really very cute. It still broke my heart to hear him cry.
Just before Carder's 2 month Pediatrician appointment, he began having a few symptoms that concerned me. He had begun eating quite a bit more at each feeding, but the amount of spit up had increased as well. In addition, towards the end of the feeding, he began crying while being fed. This alarmed us both. After discussing these changes with the Pediatrician, it was determined that he probably has acid reflux. This isn't what I had hoped to hear - after all, I have several friends who have suffered through reflux hell. I got his prescription for Zantac filled that day and started giving him the meds that night. I don't know how much of the first few doses that he got - he spit quite a bit of them back out. I tasted the medicine and figured out that perhaps it needed to be flavored. The pharmacy then flavored the medicine, but I don't think it tastes any better. It actually may taste worse now. Anyway, I have been putting the medication further back in his mouth and I think he is getting more of it now.
BUT
Since the vaccines, Carder's appetite has decreased drastically. He went from eating 5 ounces at almost every feeding to eating barely 3. And the crying at the end of a feeding hasn't improved much, if at all. Derek isn't convinced that he has reflux (but he doesn't see every single feeding like I do) and he thinks we shouldn't be giving Carder medication if he doesn't need it. I agree that we shouldn't use a medication if we don't need it, but at the same time, I know that he can't quite tell us if it hurts.
And I know that something isn't right. Babies don't cry at the end of a bottle unless it is empty and they are still hungry. Carder is crying with the bottle in his mouth while there is still plenty there AFTER he has finished an ounce or more. And I also know from reading the stories of other moms online that NOT treating reflux can have terrible outcomes as the baby begins to avoid feedings due to the pain.
I wish that I had waited to start the medication until after the vaccines had a few days to get out of his system, that way I would know if the decrease in appetite was a side effect of the vaccine or the Zantac.
I did put in a call to the Pediatrician today to get his input on what could be causing the decrease in appetite. He indicated it could be either the vaccines or the Zantac and he said we should stop using the Zantac for a few days to see if the amount of feeding increases and then to call them back with an update. Since the immunization side effects should be wearing off any time now, I don't really know what this will accomplish - other than delaying the medication from helping him if it is going to.
I am going to go with the Pediatrician's recommendation to stop the Zantac for now. And I am going to do some more research online. However, if the crying at the end of a feeding doesn't get any better, I am going to schedule another visit with the Pediatrician to see if we can get to the bottom of this before it gets worse or before the damage is irreparable.
Visit with the Grandparents
Last week, my parents drove up from Georgia and spent a week with us. My mom had gotten to meet Carder when he was born, but hadn't had a chance to hold him or give him much loving. This was my Dad's first trip to meet his grandson.
Both of my parents were enamored with Carder. They spent every moment they could holding him, kissing him, feeding him, nuzzling with him. It really was great to finally see my parents getting to spend time with him. I had waited a long time to get to see my parents as grandparents. Seeing them bond with Carder was definitely worth the wait.
Both of my parents were enamored with Carder. They spent every moment they could holding him, kissing him, feeding him, nuzzling with him. It really was great to finally see my parents getting to spend time with him. I had waited a long time to get to see my parents as grandparents. Seeing them bond with Carder was definitely worth the wait.
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| A Kiss from Grandpa |
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| Nuzzling with Grandma in the Nursery |
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| Grandpa reading "Go, Dog! Go", one of my favorite childhood books |
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| Early Morning Nap in their PJ's - Grandma and Carder |
It was a great visit. My mom had cooked and frozen quite a few meals. While they were here, we were very well fed with very minimal time in the kitchen. Mom even brought along a few extra things to leave in our freezer so that I could have some quick and easy meals for days that cooking was hard to get to. Dad helped Derek with a few projects around the house that I hadn't been able to help with. I got to take a few naps at times when I wouldn't normally have been able to. We didn't go anywhere and do anything, but we had an excellent time. And I am not sure who was more spoiled by the time they left - Carder or me.
Although I had anticipated their leaving being difficult, it was harder than I had imagined it would be. The day they left, I cried multiple times and spent the day wishing that we lived closer. When we moved to Michigan, I never thought that living that far from my parents would be as difficult as it has been. Becoming a mother has created a bond between my mother and I that didn't exist before, which makes the distance between us that much harder.
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