So, if anyone read Katie's comment on my last post, you would know that I caved on Monday and bought a test. I didn't waste any money on an expensive name brand test. I only bought a cheap on at the Dollar Store. I paid a whole dollar for it. (Damn, testing gets EX-PEN-SIVE and I didn't feel like spending 10 or 15 bucks to be told no)
Anyway, I bought the test while I was talking to Katie about her fertilization report while on my lunch with the intention of using it the next morning with FMU. By the time the end of the work day finally rolled around, I was feeling crampy. So, I didn't test Tuesday morning as I had originally planned. And by late Tuesday afternoon, AF had arrived in full force. Sucks. I guess that is enough about that. 1 month of waiting down. 1 month to go.
The rest of this post is probably just going to be randomness...
An interesting thought/comment - while on our trip to Michigan, my MIL said "I don't know why you don't just put in your order..." (referring to adoption). Sometimes I don't know why we don't either. It seems like that might be much easier than all of this waiting and watching and hurting. Sigh...
A form of the IVF law that was attempting to get passed in Georgia was passed and became effective on July 1, 2009. So, now, an embryo is considered a "person" (loosely defined) in Georgia. This was a back-door abortion law. But, this has managed to make our next step - embryo adoption - possibly a much more time consuming and expensive process (as if it wasn't difficult enough) AND we will have to go through steps similar to adoption to now receive these embryos. THANK YOU GEORGIA RESIDENTS. The good news? We will possibly be eligible for a tax credit for adoption.
The Twilight series is addictive. I have already read New Moon and I am now reading Eclipse. I never thought I could be addicted to a book about Vampires and Werewolves.
I am going to be logging off soon - I have a migraine and my meds are kicking in and I feel quite funny.
To my friends and family who are not BBCers, please keep my friends Katie and Lau in mind as they both had Egg Retrievals this week. They are both in the stressful place of waiting for their transfers and worrying about their embryos. And after the transfers the stress of the wait begins. They could sure use your thoughts and prayers.
7 comments:
Boo to AF! I know what you mean about not wasting money on the expensive tests...
It's so frustrating that the people who are enforcing these laws really have no idea how they are impacting our lives. They've never been in our shoes, they have no idea the limitations they are imposing by making their beliefs a regulation. Stupid!
Anyway, hang in there honey.
HUGS!
I'm so sorry Carli. It pisses me off that just when you start getting at least a little hope AF comes and crushes it all. I will also never understand why we have to have terrible cramps and a constant blood flow along with mood fluctuations to tell us and remind us that another cycle didn't work. It's the crappiest invention ever! Anyway big hugs to you! I'm so sorry about the law that passed. We had that come to Colorado too and knew there would be many more implications to it than people thought. It didn't pass here, but we didn't expect it to either. Good luck with your next steps forward. I really hope everything goes smoothly for you, whatever you choose to do. You deserve a break for a change! Love you!
Boo to AF from me too. And boo for laws that are passed without people fully understanding what it means to go through IF.
I wonder if it has to do with only the bad cases of multiples that get all the publicity? You know, people think they're protecting unborn children from that madness but really they're affecting a whole lot of responsible people who are not press-worthy because they're good, hard-working people making responsible decisions.
Thanks as well, sweetie for thinking of us as we go through our cycles. I truly appreciate it.
Thank you for adding me in your post (the IVF part, not the beginning). It means a lot!
I think it is crazy that your MIL said "I don't know why you don't just put in your order..." like it is ordering a custom piece of furniture or something??? To be able to move forward with adoption, your heart needs to be 100% ready for it. And if you are not, you are not and that's ok. I know I am not yet. Adoption has it's own kind of waiting, watching, and hurting. Give yourself the time you both need to decide on the step that is right for both of you to do next.
I am sorry about the Georgia law- but a tax credit would be a blessing at least. Maybe you don't need to worry about that anyway. :) Don't give up hope on your frostie yet! :)
So sorry about AF. She loves to knock you down right when you are getting that sliver of hope back, doesn't she? I'm also sorry about that new GA law, that really stinks. I hope AF goes away really quickly and that this next month brings you some good news.
Thanks for all of the words of encouragement ladies. AF does suck and I am not happy she came to visit, but I guess in all honesty, I was still expecting her arrival. I didn't even cry. You would all be proud of me.
I do want to clarify the statement my MIL made - I don't think she meant it in the way that it may have came across to some of you - I think it was more along the lines of the fact that she is tired of seeing us waiting and hurting month after month. I don't think I have mentioned this before, but Derek's sister and her husband struggled with IF as well and this put a lot of strain on their marraige - to the point where they have separated. I honestly believe that she just doesn't want to see us hurt anymore (and doesn't want to see Derek and I have problems within our marraige from this). I can't imagine the pain of seeing both of your children suffer through problems conceiving...I know we have all wondered about passing IF along to our children and I am sure that she has probably had (at least) fleeting moments where she has wondered if it was some sort of recessive gene - as we all probably would.
At any rate, I am certain that she would prefer for us to both be ready to adopt prior to taking that step.
I am really sorry to hear about AF, Carli. I am glad she didn't bring you down to tears this time. HUGS.
Stinkn' GA residents! I can say that, I lived there for four years. I can imagine the thoughtless tactics used to sway voters' minds and highly doubt there was a voice from the IF perspective to be considered. Lau, you said it best.
As for your MIL's adoption comment, as you said I am sure it was well intentioned. And I am sure her heart is hurting for you both and wishes there was an easier way. From my limited experience, adoption is not easier. It is different with its own set of worries and insecurities. It is a new game to play with a new set of rules to figure out. Katie is right, you have to be ready for that step in your own time. As much as it may hurt your family to see you both hurting in your efforts, you have to try what you are willing to do for yourselves before you go down that road.
In the mean time, you have that frostie to focus on and keep the hope there for now. That little frostie deserves the best try possible that I know you and Derek will give it when the time comes. Until then, love and restore yourselves during your break.
HUGE HUGS! Love you!
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