I Didn't Fall Off the Face of The Planet...

Just moved our family several hundred miles...

Yes, you read that right.  We have moved - to a new state no less.  It has been a whirlwind.

There has been so much that has happened in our lives since the last time that I posted and I have so many feelings and things that I want to share with anyone who may still be reading this (rarely updated) blog.

But I guess rather that backdating and trying to get the space caught up, I should start with the most recent and biggest things.

Towards the end of 2013, Derek started being "courted" by some recruiters.  This had happened several times during our lives in Michigan, but this time Derek was ready for a career change.

After a couple of grueling months of interviews and a couple of very stressful weeks with 3 on site interviews in 3 different states (and the stress of the timing of the offers that followed), Derek accepted a position with a company in Wisconsin.  (Sorry, MG, Cali didn't win...)

The next weekend, we went on a house hunting trip and found a house we fell in love with.  And after downsizing from our house in GA to fit into our house in MI, we somehow decided to buy an even smaller house in WI - but it has some really cool features and it is in an awesome neighborhood with a great school district, so I feel like it was the right move for us.

Days later, we had our house in show ready condition (which was a HUGE success considering the fact that Carder was living in the house during the time we were preparing to list).  We priced ourselves competitively as we knew we didn't want to sit on the market indefinitely.  The house hit the market and we had a TON of interest - 15 or so showings in the first few days.  2 offers in the first 48 hours. 

And before I knew it, Derek had left for Wisconsin and Carder and I were left to pack up the rest of our lives in Michigan over the next 2 weeks.  We had a few play dates and also got to spend some quality time together having fun.  I spent naps and after bedtime sorting through boxes and rounding up things to be donated and posting things that wouldn't be making the cut onto Craigslist.  The movers arrived last Monday to pack up our belongings in to boxes, the truck was loaded on Tuesday.  By last Wednesday, we were all in Wisconsin.

We are currently living in a hotel and won't be moving into our house until mid-May.  That kind of stinks, but it could be worse I suppose.

During the last week, we have spent time finding our way around our new city and doing some fun things.  I have spent nap time getting the things done that you have to do when you move to a new state and buy a new house.

I will probably try to do some updates over the next week or so (before I am back to spending naps and after bedtime getting settled into our new house).  Please check back to see the other things that have been happening in our lives lately.

2+ Years Later

When we moved to Michigan 2+ years ago (has it really been that long ago???), I was very excited about moving here and starting over.  I was also a bit nervous – the largest move in my previous history was my move to college in 1995.  But two years later, here we are – fully settled into our new city and lifestyle.  Sort of.

Lots of things have changed in our lives – we have a new home, we have a child, we have new jobs, we make a lot less money, we spend a lot less money…

So does the reality measure up to the imagined?

Well, I don’t know.

Home Wise:  I love the location we are in and the house we have.  Would there be a few tweaks I would make?  Sure.  But I am so glad we aren’t living in a drafty old house that needs remodeling (Been there, done that, wouldn’t want to attempt it with a toddler unless you paid me a million dollars and I could live in a hotel while the construction crew worked.)

Job Wise:   I absolutely LOVE my job – more than any other job I have had in the past.  The company is great, the hours couldn’t be better, the pay is wonderful (especially since I am just part time).  I don’t think I would change anything about my employment situation – not right now.  And if I did make a change, it would be in the number of hours I work and some of what I do (because a lot of it is data entry and I get bored).  But I wouldn't change the place I work.  Derek, on the other hand, isn’t exactly as happy as I am.  He took a BIG pay cut (and also a big cut in title/respect) for the ability to move to the location we wanted to live in.  While he still appreciates the value in living where we chose to live, the pay cut sucks.  And so does the loss of feeling important.  This is especially hard on him when he sees emails from his former co-workers who are moving up the corporate ladder.  There are very few rungs left for him on the ladder he is on.

Financially:  When we moved here, we didn’t know what my employment was going to be.  We planned our expenses around what Derek was going to be making.  My wages are going special projects (like the pergola and fireplace in the backyard), repairs/replacements (the new washing machine and mattress), the little extras in life (like dining out and entertainment), and into savings.  We have made some bank this last year, which is nice.  Do we still have the conversations about “what if” we still made our old salaries and lived on our current budget?  Well, yeah.  And that is freaking depressing.  But we are doing OK.

Friend Wise:  This one has been tough on me.  We have several people whom we call “friends”  in our new location and these relationships are growing.  I still consider my “BFF” in Georgia to be my bestie, even if we don’t talk as much as we used to and don’t’ get to have our lunches together 2-3 times per week.  Now, I pick up lunch and eat it at my desk.  As far as couple outings, we probably go out and do things with other couples more now than we did when we lived in Georgia (because we don’t spend every free moment remodeling a house).  But there are times I am seriously lonely.  It isn’t as if I want to trade my BFF in for another one, but I most of the time I feel like I am nothing more than an “acqaintence” to these friends I have made.  I get offers for play dates and couple dates and act on them and reciprocate the offers.  There are some relationships that show promise, but I often find myself feeling like I am walking the line between being friendly and stalker.  This is further complicated by my southern “manners”.  Where I grew up, you offered to do things like bring food after surgery or help out with the kids for a friend when she had a Dr. appt and her husband is out of town.  There have been a few times I have made offers like this and the result has been the sound of crickets – as in my offer isn’t even acknowledged…I almost feel as if I am in middle school and I am chasing after some high school boy that doesn’t even know my name.  So sad, really.  I do have a friend that I have done a few things with that shows promise, so that is nice.

Lifestyle Wise:  (Please note – I am in NO WAY saying that I wish we didn’t have a child, so anything said here that makes me seem any less than grateful for our child is not intended).  This one has been a tough one on both of us.  We wanted to move here for all it had to offer – awesome downtown and eateries, festivals, wineries and microbreweries, the bike trail, skiing, snowshoeing, the beaches…  But we planned our move here based on the life we knew – one without a child.  It was easy to imagine how much fun our lives here when a childless existence was all we had known.  But as they say, having a child changes everything.  Perhaps we are bad at parenting (because Carder isn’t a “difficult” child), but we can’t quite seem to figure out how to do everything we would like to do.  As he has gotten older, doing the things we wanted to do has gotten easier – but it takes planning and foresight and you have to be home to get him to bed at a reasonable time – it’s just so much more complicated and difficult than I ever imagined it would be.   This spring has shown me that perhaps this summer will be the one where the reality starts to live up to our expectations a bit more.

Plus, we need to find babysitter for those non-child friendly activities.  We do have my in-laws who live 2.5 hours away who will gladly come babysit at any time (and for that we are very appreciative and we love the fact that Carder gets to spend time with his grandparents).  On the downside, it requires an overnight stay on their part (which makes romantic date night out of the question in my book).   The 2.5 hour trip means you also have to have advance planning (there is no deciding to go to the movies and to dinner early in the day because that is totally unfair to them).

The bottom line - Is our city still KICK ASS?  Absolutely.  Just maybe in a different way than we originally thought it would be.  And perhaps even more so this summer.  I sure hope so.

5 Weeks Pregnant and Preparing to Move

I am still having a hard time believing that I am pregnant - It seems as if it is all just a dream.  I really don't have too many symptoms yet, which is probably the main reason why I am having a hard time believing this is real.  I think that if I could, I would have my blood drawn every single day to make sure that the numbers are still rising.  There is just something so comforting about hearing that your numbers are doubling.  Even though the RE didn't want to do a 3rd Beta, I would have loved to have the reassurance of hearing the number.

I do have are slight cramping off and on - which, although this is completely normal, it is also quite freaky.  And I am having some moments of nausea here and there, but no vomit at this point.

I will be totally honest, though.  I am so scared that something is going to go wrong.  I know that the 2WW to find out if it worked was tough.  But the 2WW to find out if our baby or babies are growing as they should be is a tough one.  HOW do people handle this without freaking out completely???

In other news, we are preparing for the move.  Everything is on for the closing on the day before Thanksgiving.  So, we are starting to pack things up.  The thing is - I still can't lift over 25 lbs.  And, since most things don't have a weight stamped on them, determining what I can lift is a bit tough.  I am putting things in boxes and making Derek move them around.  My in laws are coming the help us pack things up, so I really don't have to do too much - they are very capable packers and I am so lucky to have them to help us.

But the problem is that when I am not doing anything to prepare for the move, I feel anxious about getting everything done.  Add that to the anxiety of waiting on the ultrasound and I start to freak out.  So, I have sorted out some things and packed a few boxes and that seems to have helped to abate the anxiety a bit.  In addition, we made a few lists of what needs to be done and what needs to go to the rental and that seems to have helped it too.

I just wish that I could fast forward to the Monday of our ultrasound.  Then the move would be over, we would be all settled in our rental house and we would know what is going on in there.