Friday, November 6, 2009

8.8

That isn't the number of seconds that I stayed on the bull.  That was my HCG level from my beta.

The original conversation with the nurse basically said that below 10 was technically a negative and that I should stop all medications and go back next Friday for another beta to make sure everything was gone.  I numbly said OK and hung up.

After I had a few minutes to digest this information, I began to wonder - What IF our embryo WAS a procrastinator???  What if it was just late implantation?  Wouldn't stopping my meds mean that I was giving up on our little embryo before it had a chance?  What if THIS is our miracle?

So I called the nurse back.  I asked her if there was ANY chance that this coule be a viable pregnancy.  She said the chance was very small.  But she did give me the option of continuing to take the medication and going back in on Monday for another beta.

Maybe I am a glutton for punishment, but I am going to keep taking the meds and go back for another beta on Monday.

I just don't want to spend the rest of my life worrying that I didn't do everything possible to make this little embryo have every chance to become our future child...

11 comments:

BB said...

Sending you super strong sticky vibes and praying for your beta numbers to jump high!

Courtney said...

Praying for you! I hope that you get great numbers on Monday.

Grace said...

All things are possible to those who believe. If you can, please read Mark 11:24, it's my life scripture for this fertility journey now!
I have just said a prayer for you, please stay in faith and will be thinking of you!

twondra said...

Here from Kate's blog. You are definitely in my thoughts and prayers and praying for your embryo to just be a procrastinator. (((HUGS)))

Once Upon A Time said...

Carli, I've been thinking about you so hard, I had a dream about you last night... and you were a mommy in my dream. That embryo has a great cheering section- many people are pulling for you!

Anonymous said...

(katie sent me.) i know that little bean is just being a procrastinator! sending you all of the happiest thoughts in the world. i'll be thinking of you. huuuuuge hugs.

MelissaP05 said...

Know that I'm thinking of you and sending lots of prayers your way!

Ellie said...

Carli, I'm praying for you today! I'm sure you have a wide range of emotions right now! I really hope that this little embryo is hanging on! You definitely deserve this. Much love and big hugs!! Please let us know what you find out.

Anonymous said...

Praying for peace and strength to take this road one step at a time.

Jem said...

Oh, please let us know what happens... We are praying for you!

Grace said...

Still thinking of you...